Reflections on a Blowbang
October 10, 2008
After my recent experience with a 10-guy blowbang/bukkake party, I have a much greater appreciation for the talents of some porn stars now. Do you have any idea how hard it is to suck ten cocks in succession, while using your hands to jerk off two others simultaneously, especially after your face has been covered in cum and you can’t see shit? I suppose it is one thing to do that with three guys, but to have the cocks you’re playing with continuously recycle for almost an hour…it gets a bit overwhelming. When I was finished, my neck and jaw were sore. Maybe it is one of those things where practice makes perfect? 
Anyway, as I mentioned a few weeks ago, some members of a local sex club asked me to be the center in a blowbang. We negotiated the rates, and after having the guys go through two rounds of STD testing, I agreed to entertain them for up to an hour – they could each have as many pops as they could achieve during that time, and they could cum anywhere they wanted. It seemed to be a pretty active club, with well over a hundred people (singles and couples) as members; they just wanted some “fresh” talent to play with. I got ready and headed off for the club, arriving right on time, and went in. I was introduced to everyone and we spent a few minutes checking everyone’s identification (to compare against the test results). When that was out of the way we discussed the game plan and the rules of engagement, then got ready for the festivities.
One of the guys asked if I would take my hair down instead of leaving it pulled back – he thought I looked “a lot hotter” that way. I knew that’d make for more time in the shower afterward, but that’s what my clients wanted, so that’s what they would get. I went into the bathroom and took it down and brushed it out, then removed all of my clothes and walked out into the room they’d set up for the party. There was a nice wide cushion in the middle of the room, so I walked straight to it, knelt down and said, “Bring it on.” The guys began taking off their clothes and getting themselves hard. Most of them already had standing erections when they pulled their pants off.
The sex itself started off pretty slowly, actually. I had to convince the guys they weren’t going to break me. “Haven’t you guys seen this kind of stuff in porn before?” I laughed. They seemed almost hesitant to use me, as if they were trying to be gentle because they were paying me, or because I was new, or something. It wasn’t doing anything for me at all, though. And while my role as a paid professional was to satisfy them, I booked this event just as much for me as anything else. And, well, I wanted some…entertainment out of it myself.
“Fuck me like you mean it. Grab my hair if you need to.” They still didn’t get it, so I had to pull my mouth off this one guy’s gorgeous cock, “Look guys, I want you to fuck my face. Use my mouth like you would my cunt. Just grab my hair and fuck me. If it gets to be too much I’ll let you know, I promise. I’ll slap you on the leg.” Finally, someone took the initiative and went to work. He grabbed my hair and force fed me his cock, causing me to gag a bit – I hadn’t had one in my throat yet, so it hadn’t quite relaxed. I got over that soon enough, though, and began giving the kind of hands-free blowjobs I consider my specialty. That allowed me to use my free hands to jerk off the guys standing to either side of me. As each guy would come up, he’d grab my head and guide his cock into me, letting go of it once he’d entered my mouth. I tried to maintain eye contact with the guy fucking my face at any given moment, but with all of the movement and whatnot going on around me that proved to be more difficult than you might imagine.
Each man waited his turn, with his cock in his hand keeping himself hard. One by one, they’d penetrate me and begin thrusting. I’d take them in my mouth and swallow them down to their balls and then mouth fuck them until they were ready to let the next guy in. Within about ten minutes one guy was ready cum. He pushed the guy whose cock I had in my mouth out of the way and unloaded what seemed like gallons of semen on my face – he must’ve been saving all week for this.
The cum started running down the bridge of my nose and slid off in a long stringy white thread. That always tickles, so I had to reach up and wipe the cum off the tip of my nose. I just twirled it it around my finger and stuck it in my mouth, then pulled it out to allow a cock to replace the finger. One after the other the cocks kept coming. I will say that I have never felt sluttier in my life, having one random cock after another push into my mouth, my throat, with my lips and tongue wrapping around them. It was pretty surreal at the time, being surrounded by that many people – that many cocks - all just waiting for their opportunity to use my mouth. It was at this point that it occurred to me that professional porn stars’ talents are perhaps underrated to a degree.
The guy in my mouth pulled out and announced he was going to cum. I just looked up at him and that sent him over the edge. He shot another huge load at me and since my face was turned up a bit, one of the volleys went right up my left nostril and my head jerked back. Fuck, that hurt. If you’ve ever had soda burp up into your nose, you have some idea what this felt like. His second shot landed in a big dollop right in my left eye, which happened to be open at the time. He apologized, and I had to stop for a second to blow the cum out of my nose and clean my eye out.
Fortunately, since this was to be a bukkake party as well, I hadn’t worn my contacts. I knew I’d likely be getting cum in my eyes, and semen and contacts don’t mix very well at all. So I really couldn’t see terribly clearly from the get go. I considered wearing my glasses, but I knew they’d be covered in cum, too, and I still wouldn’t be able to see shit, so why even bother. Even with your eyes closed some of that cum will leak into your eyes if you even barely take the pressure off your eyelids; there’s no way to keep your eyes closed that tightly for any long period of time, especially when you have to concentrate on so many other things. Cum stings but the pain goes away after a couple of minutes so I’d prepared myself to just deal with it and move on.
Semen blasts out of a cock at about 30 miles per hour in some cases. And sometimes it just oozes out. That’s so sad when you’re trying to plaster someone’s face I’d have to imagine. The specific strength behind how much pressure you get apparently has something to do with how aroused you are, how long you’ve been aroused, how long it has been since your last ejaculation, and so forth, and based on that it would appear that several of these guys had been saving up.
Being hit between the eyes with a strong spurt of cum at that speed is an interesting feeling, especially if you don’t see it coming. It is not unlike being shot in the face with a water gun, actually. I could always get a sense of when someone was about to unload on me because the guy whose cock I had in my mouth would withdraw and nothing would replace it. I could hear someone approach me and could tell he was jerking himself off. So I just sat there with my eyes closed each time waiting for the stream to hit my face; I didn’t even squench my face up any longer.
I have become so enamored at having someone cum on my face that I now have little “baby orgasms” each time someone does it. It’s more of a little tingling in my crotch, I guess, than anything like a serious orgasm. But it is noticeable and it feels good. The only thing I can attribute this to is the way in which I was introduced to the facial – it was so slutty now that I look back on it - I guess I just have a psychological predilection toward seeing it as a dirty thing to do. And, of course, that gets me off.
I’ve made comments before about the sounds involved during sex, and this was another one of those situations where I had to rely on my ears to gain some sense what was going on. I’m not even sure how you’d describe to someone the sounds you hear from a room full of men jerking themselves off, grunting and groaning as they build up and release. Those that have applied lube to their cocks have this sort of squishy sound going on, and I can hear my slurping on the cock I have in my mouth at any given moment. As it fucks deeper into my mouth and then withdraws it kind of creates a vacuum on the way out. I have to open my mouth just a bit to equalize the pressure and that, too, causes a sound.
I even find myself subconsciously grunting and growling when I’m being face fucked. I know in a lot of porn movies when the girls are being throat fucked they make these silly noises that just drive me batty, and I thought to myself, “Gosh, I hope I don’t sound that ridiculous.” I even tried to suppress it for the short period of time that I could focus on it. And then you factor in everyone’s breathing – especially the heavier breathing as someone approachs an orgasm. It all generates a cacophony that you really never even hear in a porno because of all of that ridiculous moaning and yapping and all the other shit they overlay on the soundtrack.
You also don’t notice the differences in taste of the guys’ cocks after a few minutes. Your mouth doesn’t really go numb, but it becomes so overloaded with the taste of cock, the taste of the cum that has leaked into your mouth from your face, the mucus from the back of your throat, the perspiration (the room was warm), the taste of the lube and so forth that it all just meshes into an unidentifiable concoction with an almost amorphous, salty-sweet-bitter taste.
One guy got a bit upset because I took my hand away from his cock to masturbate myself at one point. I guess as he saw it they were paying for me to service them, not pleasure myself. But I needed to cum. Desperately. I can generally make myself have an orgasm if I squeeze my legs together, but kneeling down as I was with my legs kind of spread out inhibits that, so I needed my hand touching my clit to pull that trigger. I think that is the first time I’ve had an orgasm with a guy’s cock in my throat. My body was contorting as the waves of ecstasy pulsed through me and I was making these guttural sounds that had to be vibrating this man’s cock to one degree or another. It must’ve been a unique feeling for him as well because he came nearly simultaneously, shooting his load into the back of my mouth as I moved up and down on him. I swallowed all of it without missing a beat, while I was having my own orgasm.
I hope he wasn’t upset by the fact that he came in my mouth rather than on my face. It is not easy to close your throat and continue going down on a guy’s cock while it is cumming, not losing a drop and keeping yourself from choking on all of that cum. I’ll usually try to hold the cum in my mouth until a guy’s done and then swallow it all in one load. If I leave my throat open the spurts will hit the back of it, and even with my throat relaxed, those shots will still trigger my gag reflex, causing me to choke up and interrupting the flow of things (no pun intended). Add to that the fact that my body was still recovering from the orgasm I’d just given myself and I think you can get a sense of how difficult this was. Normally, I breathe through my mouth heavily when I am cumming and this time I had to keep it tightly closed around this cock thrusting in and out of my face. I was quite proud of the fact that I’d managed to do all of this, actually.
One after the other the guys unloaded on me, mostly my face, but one guy had a fascination with my boobs, so he released himself on those. There always seems to be one guy in the crowd with a thing for tits. I’d occasionally reach up and try to wipe the cum out of my eyes and away from my nostrils, and would lick whatever was on my fingers off to the delight of the men in the room. Like I said, the room was relatively warm. Otherwise, I’d have been cold with all of that liquid running down my body.
As we progressed, I know at least a couple of the men managed to get off second shots. Quite honestly I completely lost track of how many loads I took, but once you’re covered in that much cum it really doesn’t matter any longer. I just kept sucking until the last man acquiesced and they called it a wrap. Everyone was very complimentary of my talents and techniques – no one was left…unsatisfied.
When it was finally over, I slowly got up onto my feet – my knees were cramping from having to support my weight for the past hour or so. I toweled myself off to keep from tracking cum through the building and had to have someone guide me to the shower. I hopped in and began washing off. My hair was a soggy mess – I actually wish I’d had a photo of what I looked like before I’d gotten in. The entire front of my body was covered in gooey, runny semen. It took me a good forty five minutes to get myself cleaned up. When I was finished, I collected my money and my things and went home…to take another shower!
I know it sounds cliché to say it, and I suspect many people won’t believe it, but I felt incredibly empowered to be able to let go like that and not only enjoy it for myself, but to provide others with a good time as well. It was challenging, and personally empowering. I’d certainly never remotely suggest that my comfort with it (or the act itself) would empower other women, or empower women in general. I’ve always enjoyed the stimulation overload I get from some sexual encounters, however, and this one was an exponential increase over anything I’d experienced before, including my one other experience with having multiple guys cum on me. In that case I was pretty much passive. Here, I was actively engaged and enticing the guys to ejaculate onto me. So all in all I was quite pleased with my performance.
Probably the only thing that was missing from the experience for me was dirty talk. It would’ve made for a hotter experience for me if the guys had been saying something other than the grunts, moans and the occasional “I’m cumming.” Even a “Suck my cock, bitch” would’ve been nice if for no other reason than to break the sound monotony. I know that some of my clients enjoy the dirty talk during our sessions as well and it just seems to make the whole experience that much more intense.
I won’t lie, though, I felt like a porn star, and I was getting off on it. I’ve always thought I could easily do porn; I love sex and I’m a bit of an exhibitionist (you pretty much have to be to be a stripper). I don’t mind fucking someone in front of an audience, either. Several times as a teenager I had sex with a boyfriend or girlfriend in the same room as one or more couples who were also fucking each other. We’d rent hotel rooms or spend some party time in the guest house my parents had on our property in Nashville. I know we’d stop and watch the other couples from time to time and I’d see them watching me as I was fucking. It never occurred to me to be embarrassed about it.
Doing porn would memorialize my sex work, though. Twenty years from now, people would still be able to see me fucking and it would be definitive proof of what I had done, though it’d be vintage porn at that point.
I don’t have a problem with that in and of itself, but as you all know, with today’s ridiculous double standards and this incessant need to demonize someone who has the audacity to publicly admit they are sexual creatures, many employers would balk at hiring a porn star. Some would go so far as to fire someone who’d been in porn before once they found out about it. I think that is asinine, of course, but I recognize it as a reality that must be dealt with. Therefore, no porn for me. With my escort work, there’s plausible denial - at least, so long as I don’t end up getting arrested and having a record. But I do often wonder what kind of success I’d have in the porn industry. I’d need some more practice, though. 
I Love…
September 30, 2008
I love being a sexual creature - enjoying my sexuality on my terms, fuck what anyone else on this planet has to say about it.
I love hearing someone whisper “god damn” under their breath when I take my clothes off in front of them.
I love the look in a guy’s eyes when he sees me looking up at him with my lips wrapped around the head of his cock.
I love the feeling of a cock penetrating my throat.
I love feeling the pulsations and contractions of a rock hard cock as the guy ejaculates what seems like gallons and gallons of cum into my mouth.
I love the ease with which I am able to seduce other women.
I love the taste of a woman’s cunt.
I love the slightly pungent scent of someone’s asshole as I take a deep breath when I am getting ready to rim them.
I love the little grunt or moan that every single woman I’ve been with has let out when the tip of my tongue touches her clit for the first time.
I love the challenge of trying to make another woman cum.
I love the sensation of that spasm just as a man’s cock pushes into my asshole.
I love having my hair pulled, hard, when being fucked in a doggy position.
I love the sound of someone whispering dirty thoughts into my ear, fucking my imagination as they fuck my body.
I love being able to drop to my knees and become a submissive little whore at the click of a finger.
I love being able to stand up and become a dominant bitch at the crack of a whip.
I love the squishy sounds of a guy as he jerks his cock right in front of me, and then his grunts as he cums.
I love the sight of a cock two inches from my eyes just before it explodes all over my face.
I love having a man tell me to bend over his knees so he can spank me for being naughty.
I love the sound and the sting of an open, bare hand slapping my ass.
I love having my nipples bitten and pulled, hard, as a prelude to penetration.
I love being pushed down on the bed and grudge fucked from behind.
I love having my limits tested during a sexual encounter.
I love that my orgasms last for as long as a minute in some cases.
I love being told that I just gave someone the strongest orgasm they’ve ever had.
I love when someone I am fucking just lets go verbally during an orgasm, male or female.
I love being told that I am the best fuck someone has ever had, whether it was paid for with cash or not.
I love being told that someone appreciates the fact that they can call me a slut in the bedroom without feeling guilty about it.
I love being told that I should get paid to fuck people for a living by someone who doesn’t know what I do professionally.
I love being comfortable fucking someone and getting paid for it.
I love being able to fuck someone once and never seeing them again if I don’t want to.
I love knowing that I don’t base my sense of self worth solely on my sexual esteem, my self esteem, or my perception of my physical attributes.
I love enjoying…sex.
And I love the fact that many of you are either hard, or wet, from reading this.
Graphic of the Day
September 28, 2008
I don’t know its original source, but I think this is an accurate representation.
Flying the Friendly Skies
September 26, 2008
For as long as I can remember, I have always had this effect on people, of both sexes. It is like a sexual magnetism that attracts me to others and to specific situations that most other people probably sense or maybe even recognize, but rarely do anything about (mostly due to a lack of self confidence). I knew this even when I was a young teenager. Even then, though, I understood the power inherent in that capability and sought to control it lest it get out of hand.
As I gained more confidence in myself and began to understand the dynamic that exists between two humans with respect to sexual chemistry and how it plays out, typically and atypically, I began to utilize this power for my own personal enjoyment. I still do, obviously, and am now using it to earn a living. I’ve never been one to be “shy” about expressing myself sexually. That scares some people (and by that I mean those who know nothing about me personally and are afraid of expressions of human sexuality in general, especially female sexuality), but for others it can be an open door into their own sexual exploration.
My GF and I went to Arizona over the Thanksgiving holiday a couple of years ago to visit her mom and step dad. The Wednesday evening flight had an interesting twist to it. Before I tell you about it, keep in mind that my GF and I had had an open relationship since we became an “official” couple in 2005, so long as anyone we played with was female (up until the point where I started sex work, of course). There’s a long story behind this, and maybe I’ll share it one day. But for the time being, you need to know that to understand how this could have unfolded as it did without any issues between us.
Nikki and I flew from home (Fort Lauderdale) to Tucson, AZ, by way of Atlanta that Wednesday evening. We sat in the aisle and middle seats in row 15. An hour or so into the flight, I happened to glance over at the people sitting across from us, and noticed the girl in the middle of the other side looking at a book with a page containing a photo of a topless woman and a heading of “pony play.” I thought, “Damn, that’s weird.” A few minutes later, I glanced back (trying not to be obvious!) and she was on another page that had headings of “Bukkake” and “Feet.” Now my curiosity was piqued. This girl appeared to be about 18 and was looking at something that appeared to be about porn, and she was reading it out in the open with another younger girl next to her on one side, and someone I assumed to be her mother on the other side.
So here I was pretending to read my book and trying to keep my eyes on her book to see if I could figure out what she was looking at. She finally moved it to where I could see the title of it: “The Big Book of Porn.” I was like, WTF? She’s reading this in front of other people on an airplane. *I* wouldn’t have the guts to do that, even if I did know the other people around me. Anyway, I thought, well, let’s play with this a little bit and see where it leads us. So I stared at her for a minute until she saw me looking at her. She saw me and acted like nothing was out of the ordinary! I’m like, this is very…different.
She finally got up to go to the bathroom, so I followed her back. I waited until she came out and she was startled that I was there. I asked her if her book was any good. She just grinned and said it was for a class assignment. I told her I would never have the guts to read it out in front of my mother and sister (my assumption of who the two around her was). She laughed and said the other girl was her younger sister, and she had no clue who the other woman was! So she was reading this book with all of these porno pictures in it right next to this older woman (who, incidentally, never batted an eye as best I can tell). Anyway, we chatted for a minute, and as it turns out she’s reading it for a theater class at the University of Georgia (the book is about porn movies)! So, I tell her that I want to take a look at it when she gets done with it (we’re on a three and a half hour flight) – that I want to see what it says about lesbian porn. She got the most curious look on her face – almost as if she was embarrassed, but not really. One of those “Oh, really?” looks I guess you’d say.
So, when I get back to my seat from the bathroom, she has changed seats to the aisle and hands me the book. I cruise through it for a few minutes and find a handful of references to lesbian porn and scenes in a small number of movies. I hand it back to her and tell her thanks, but it didn’t have much of interest to me about what I was looking for. I ask her if she likes porn, and she hesitated for a second and said, “a little.” I just said, “cool.”
So, after a bit of time goes by, I keep looking over at her. She’s fairly attractive, and I just can’t keep my eyes off of her and keep from thinking how cool it was for a girl to be sitting in an open space reading a book with “Porn” splattered all over the place! After a bit of conversation with Nikki about some possibilities, I finally work up the nerve to ask her if she likes lesbian porn. She just stares at me for a few seconds and says “Yeah, I guess.” I can sense that she’s embarrassed about it, but I just keep looking at her and finally I just say, “That’s awesome.” I give it a little bit more time to sink in, and just keep looking at her (her name is Melissa, btw).
I finally work up the nerve to do something, and as I’m looking at her again, I make just a slight motion with my head toward the back of the airplane, and get up to go back to the bathroom. To my incredible surprise, she gets up and follows me back there (as I had *so* hoped she would). I go into the bathroom and pull her in with me. Those bathrooms are tight to begin with, but with two people in them…. We kissed each other for probably a full minute before we separated lips! As much as I’d loved to have joined the Lesbian Mile High Club right then, it just wasn’t possible in that bathroom! Anyway, we kissed a couple more times and then she left to go back to her seat. I straightened up and went back to mine as well.
We continued to make eye contact for the entire rest of the flight. When we landed, we both headed straight to the bathroom and found ourselves in the handicapped stall French kissing like there was no tomorrow. As much as I’d love to say we re-created the supposed Panther’s Cheerleader scene with the sex and all, we didn’t – we just made out for a few more minutes, and went back out. Nikki and Melissa’s sister were outside talking when we left the bathroom.
As far as I can tell, Melissa’s sister had no idea what was going on! Anyway, we collected all of our luggage, and each went our separate ways. Neither one of us asked the other one where we were going or anything else. It was just so………random, and not something I would’ve predicted I would have done before tonight. But, dayum! The skies don’t get much friendlier than that, I’m thinking.
Sadly, the flight home a few days later was very uneventful.
Sex, Sexuality, and Sensuality
September 22, 2008
Sexuality is much more than just one concept, as most of you probably realize. It includes several components that interact to determine how you function sexually in society. It is important to understand the central concepts behind what we tend to globally group into the common term “sexuality” in order to fully understand and appreciate your sex life as I see it.
The term “sex” as used by most people refers to the actual mechanics of sexual intercourse. For some people this will include the precursors such as kissing, making out, foreplay, and all of the other activities that actually lead up to penetrative sexual intercourse. For others, it simply refers to the act of intercourse. When someone asks you if you’ve “had sex” your first thoughts are, most likely, of you and your partner in some form of missionary sex position going at it like a couple of banshees! You and your partner must come to an agreement on what “sex” means to your relationship. There are a variety of philosophical arguments about whether oral sex is “sex” for example (thanks Bill!). Only the two of you can determine that for your relationship.
The term “sexuality” itself is misused quite a bit. The word actually refers to the social, emotional and spiritual components that identify you sexually, and represents the psychological aspects of your sexual identity. It includes such things as how you perceive your body sexually, how you choose to interact with others sexually, your philosophy on intimacy and emotional involvement within the context of sex, and your own personal limits on what you find acceptable in terms of sexual activity. Think of it as your sexual character!
Some people use the term incorrectly to characterize their sexual orientation. If they’re asked, “What is your sexuality?” (by someone who also does not understand the term), they’d reply with something on the order of, “I’m straight.” This is an incorrect usage – see the section on sexual orientation below.
Everyone has a “sexual identity.” Your sexual identity determines how you interact sexually with others as you proceed through life, and is a global term used to describe your gender identity, your gender role, and your sexual orientation.
For most people, their “gender identity”, or sense of “maleness” or “femaleness,” is pretty clear cut and develops as they grow up. There are some instances where this may not develop according to what society considers “normal,” however. For instance, some parents raise their daughters as tom boys, which means that they have what many consider to be more masculine attributes (i.e., the way they dress, being involved in competitive sports, etc.), and they appear to have lost what many consider to be some attributes that normally identify females. This is true for boys as well, in the opposite direction of course, and may or may not cause issues as one grows up.
In some instances, a person’s gender identity is in conflict with his/her biological identity (as determined by the physical attributes of their body). This is referred to as being “transgendered,” and dealing with this can lead to a lot of emotional conflict, especially as one grows through puberty and adolescence. In some instances these people will go on to have gender reassignment surgery to “fix” themselves and make them into the sex that they feel they are emotionally, but for many others this is never a real option .
“Gender roles” are those societal definitions of what “boys do” and what “girls do” as they move through life. For example, only females are supposed to wear dresses, or only males are supposed to wear their hair closely cropped; women are supposed to be in the kitchen, men are supposed to work to support the family. Fortunately, we’re getting away from the narrow constructs that have defined those roles in the past, despite organizations who’d like to see us stay cemented to those antiquated definitions of what men and women are “supposed to do.”
“Sexual orientation” is a term used to characterize who you generally prefer to have sexual relations with. Heterosexuals prefer to have sex with someone of the opposite gender, homosexuals (also called “gays” [male and female] or “lesbians” [females only]) prefer to have sex with someone of the same gender, and bisexuals are people who are able to enjoy sexual activity with someone of either gender. Your sexual orientation is one of the more visible components of your overall “sexuality.”
And while most people will identify themselves as being one of the three, sociobiologist Alfred Kinsey determined in his studies of the late 1950s that just about everyone was bisexual to one degree or another, and developed a sliding scale he used to represent a continuum that one could move across as they re-evaluated their sexuality through time. (Fritz Klein developed his own scale that expanded upon Kinsey’s, by the way.)
“Intimacy” is another term that you should be familiar with. The term represents the emotional investment you make in or with someone else, along with your ability and willingness to share your emotions with another person, care for them, and the extent to which it can be said that you “like” someone. Any investment involves risk, and emotional risk is always a huge factor when you are forming an intimate bond with another person. As you become more intimate with someone, whether it leads to a sexual relationship or not, you open yourself up to vulnerability. Therefore, the development of intimacy with another person is a huge step in any relationship.
For most people, the development of intimacy with another person is required before the development of a sexual relationship. For others, however, this is not necessarily true. Some people do not place as high a value on the emotional attachment to someone else if they are in a relationship strictly for the sexual aspects of it. Only the individuals involved can determine whether this is the right path to follow or not.
“Sensuality” is an awareness and feeling about your own body and other people’s bodies, especially the bodies of potential sexual partners. Sensuality is what enables you to feel good about how your body looks and feels and what it can do sexually. It involves such things as how you perceive your body (body image), how you process and react to sexual attraction and sexual tension involving other people, and how you enjoy and react to the senses during interpersonal interaction with someone else. Another major component of sensuality is called “skin hunger,” which is a term used to describe your desire to be touched, held, and caressed. If you have not already done so, you will find this to be one of the more satisfying aspects of a physical relationship.
Sensuality also describes how your body physically and emotionally reacts to inputs from the various senses associated with your body. When you become intimately involved with someone, you will find that there are unique sounds, smells, feelings (in this case, physically), sights, and even tastes associated with the interaction with that other person. If you learn to pay attention to and enjoy those sensations, you will heighten your ability to enjoy your sexuality by several magnitudes. For example, if you learn to discern the smell that lingers after your own intense sexual encounters, you will get to the point where you can literally pick up on the fact that someone else has had sex when they walk into a room! Seriously!
Sensuality derives from the brain’s concept of your own sexuality and the fantasies that you allow it to entertain. You will occasionally hear someone refer to the brain as the body’s greatest sex organ, and this is the basis for that claim. Sex is, in reality, just as much a mental exercise as it is a physical one. Mastering the physical aspects of sex is relatively easy. Anyone can learn a sex position, or a new technique. Allowing yourself to harness the power of your brain to process the emotional and spiritual aspects of a sexual encounter, however, and applying them such that both of you become enveloped in the experience with all of your senses will elevate your sex to an entirely new level, guaranteed!
As you can see, there is *so* much more to the concept of what makes you a “sexual being” than just the physical act of sex itself. If you learn to understand these, and apply them to your relationships with other people, you will find that your life experience will be much richer than those who do not. If you have not already done so, sit back and think about how these concepts define you, and how you can make use of this information to improve your sexuality.
Now, having said all of that, my favorite clients are those who come to the experience knowing who they are sexually - they’re just fun to be sexual with. That is rare, of course, just as it is in the general population, so I don’t experience it terribly often. The fact of the matter is that I very much enjoy helping people explore avenues of their sexual being that they haven’t had the opportunity to investigate as well. Usually this manifests itself in a lack of desire or willingness to ask their significant other to indulge them or engage them in some activity. Rimming is a good example.
Butt…I’ll be writing an article on rimming in the not too distant future, though, so I won’t bore you with those details right now.
Watch Me Watch You Watch Me
September 11, 2008
In a post I made several weeks ago about sense-sational sex, I mentioned that sex was always a sensual experience for me. There are several aspects to that, as I alluded to in that article, but there’s one in particular that I really enjoying playing with.
I’ve taken a good 30 or so women into their first lesbian experiences, and one of the things I like to do when I get ready to go down on a woman that first time - her first time - is to make her watch me do it. Think about that for a minute.
Many women (and many men, as well, for that matter) will lie back and close their eyes when you’re performing oral on them. Generally what they’re doing is dissociating themselves from the experience - they’re visualizing themselves being fucked as if they were a third party in the room. There are a variety of psychological reasons behind this, but that is beyond what I want to focus on in this article.
By forcing them to watch me, they connect what they’re feeling with the immediacy of the act itself, and with the person performing the act. When you watch my tongue move toward your clit (or your cock), there’s a tiny, almost imperceptible fraction of a second where your brain knows something is coming. That brief snippet of anticipation is the spiritual equivalent of skin hunger - your mind craves what is coming and in anticipation of it, your brain, your cunt, literally begs for it to happen. I’ve even known the hair to stand on its end and chill bumps to rise up on some women when I’ve hesitated for a second of two before making contact, the reaction is that powerful.
When that contact is made, and you see me looking into your eyes, it provides a direct connection between your brain and what you’re feeling in your cunt or your cock. So rather than visualizing yourself as someone being performed upon, you put yourself in the more immediate position of being in that moment, in a continuous, (hopefully) positive feedback loop with your partner. And to me, that is what sex should be about (even casual and paid sex).
That eye contact also allows me to read the person I am fucking. I can tell by watching the reaction in your eyes (as well as sensing your breathing and body movements) if what I am doing is “working” for you or not, and can adjust my technique accordingly. That skill is one thing that makes me a great fellatrix/cunnilinguist in my opinion. When women ask me about how to give good head to a guy, I’ll tell them one of the most important things you can do to make it much more erotic for him is to look into his eyes when you’re fucking his cock with your mouth. Eye contact works magic, for all genders.
And you see me watching you, too, so it causes you to expose yourself in a way - an exposure of your psyche. There’s an old saying that the eyes are the gateway into the soul, and nothing is more accurate when it comes to sex I believe. The connection made through forced eye contact can be very tenuous initially, or even embarrassing to some people, especially those who are not as open with their sexuality with themselves as others might be. Making them watch me go down on them is my way of forcing them to live their sexuality in that moment and connecting with it, though. You can’t close your eyes and pretend you’re watching yourself, or pretend to be someone else, or pretend that I am someone else. You have to sit there and watch me watch you watch me.
You may ask how I force them to watch me. If you think about the very first time someone went down on you, what would you have done if you’d been there with your legs spread open, your cunt all hot and wet, begging for attention, your partner getting ready to make contact, and your partner just…stopped? Or, if you’re a guy, the first time you got a blow job, what would you have done if you had this huge erection, just waiting to be buried in someone’s mouth, and all of the sudden your partner just …stopped? You’d have been terribly upset, right? I’ve only had two women object when I first told them I wanted them to watch me (though I have had to coax many more into watching), and in both instances I refused to go any further until they acquiesced. I told them, if you’re not going to watch me do it, then I am not going any further. That begging, that hunger I referred to earlier pushes them to the point where they gave in. And watched.
Is that mean? Perhaps on some level you could make that argument, and I suspect they’d have agreed with you initially. But I know, through conversations with many of my partners afterward, the orgasms they had from my oral attention on them those first times were extremely powerful. And I’ve had several tell me later that making them watch me was the hottest thing they’d ever experienced up to that point.
It is music to my ears to have someone say that to me about a sexual experience. 
And I guess I should point out that I don’t make them watch me the whole time, just initially. I mean, hell, even I close my eyes when I cum. It’d be hypocritical (and probably fruitless) to try to make someone else keep their eyes open through that!.
Interesting Thought for the Day
September 9, 2008
From a conversation with a friend:
I got myself off in the bathroom a few minutes ago because I was *incredibly* horny and I couldn’t get the dirty thoughts out of my head. I’ve had a couple of the men here hit on me, and hover around me since. I’m wondering if they can subconsciously sense the sexual gratification oozing out of me.
Alexa’s Update # 11
September 8, 2008
Well, I got back Tuesday morning from Fort Lauderdale, as most of you have probably read. I am still having Nikki withdrawals.
Let’s see what’s going on in Alexa-town this week…
My father is considering getting a tummy tuck, according to my mother. lmao He’s always been fit (he has incredibly sexy, runner’s legs and butt, though I’ve never told him that), but I guess age is setting in and causing him to have more tummy than he wants. Apparently, you can get them on an outpatient basis for about three or four thousand dollars these days.
My classes are very interesting, and there’s a lot of intelligent, well-read people in them. This is going better than I’d anticipated, and I am enjoying the heavy reading and class discussions. The students in graduate courses appear, at this point anyway, to be much more…mature than the undergrad ones.
Is there any other woman who just loves to have their head pushed down into the bed, face down, and just railed from behind? I mean, just, god damn. 
*fans self*
Client Updates:
I’ve seen Rick twice this week. I toyed with him a bit on Wednesday, based on a conversation I’d had with one of my friends. She said she’d love fuck me right after I’d had sex with a man, and eat his cum out of my cunt (trust me, she’s a freak, too!). I told her I was going to tell him that, that I bet he’d really get off on that. In order to do that, though, I’d have to let him fuck me bareback, without a condom. I’ve been seeing Rick for several weeks now, and I am comfortable enough with him to allow him to do that.
So when I went in Wednesday morning, I told him that I had a female client who had a special request, and outlined to him what I described above. Needless to say, he found that to be very arousing. We only have about 15-30 minutes each morning before his staff starts showing up, so I quickly got him hard with some oral attention, and then sat on his desk, and told him to fuck me, but skip the condom. He couldn’t believe his ears. He penetrated me and after only about 10 thrusts, came hard inside me. I got a pad out of my purse, put it in my panties, put them back on, pulled my skirt back on and headed out the door.
Of course, I just went home and showered and did nothing with any woman after I left him, but he didn’t know that. Thursday, when I went back to see him, he asked me how it went. I made up some stuff about her lapping his cum out of my cunt as soon as I walked into her hotel room. That got him all hot and bothered, and he wanted to know if we could “go somewhere” for some extended fun. I had no commitments so I said, “sure.” He took me to a hotel down the street, checked in, came and got me, and we spent four hours fucking. Bareback, of course.
One of the points I made in my post on decriminalization of prostitution is that prostitutes should be allowed to decide for themselves if they want to require condoms, rather than making it a state law, and that’s how I feel. If a prostitute gets to a point with a regular client where s/he feels comfortable not using protection, then I think they ought to be able to go that route. I am at such a place with Rick. I’d never do that with a new client, of course. In Nevada, where prostitution is legal in many places, they require the use of condoms for all penetrative activities. I understand the rationale, but I think the provider is in a better position to decide what level of protection is necessary. Obviously, s/he’s not going to take any unnecessary chances.
I also had my blow-bang/bukkake party Saturday afternoon - the one I’d referred to about a month ago. I got paid to blow 10 guys and allow them to cum anywhere they wanted. It started out quite awkwardly, but got better as the afternoon wore on. Surprisingly, my mouth and throat didn’t get sore. lol Anyway, I’ll be writing about what happened with this and should have it up in a couple of days, depending on how much time I have to put in for classes this week.
Other stuff:
Last Wednesday between classes, I perused some of the stores in the mall. I came across one that was selling some unique clubwear and accessories. I bought a wild new dress to go clubbing in. It is a open-weave fishnet, off-the-shoulder mini tube dress, with a matching bra and thong. There’s not much to it, but in the club I go to, I’ll actually be overdressed compared to some people.
And, apparently, my blog is written at a post-graduate level. 
That’s all for this week, so far. Like I said, keep your eyes open for my account of the blow-bang. Have a great week.
Penetrate Me
September 2, 2008
Penetrate: [pen-i-treyt]: to pierce or pass into or through; to enter the interior of; to have a deep effect or impact on someone.
Penetrate, from L. penetratus, pp. of penetrare “to put or get into, enter into,” related to penitus “within, inmost,” penus “innermost part of a temple, store of food,” penates “household gods.” Penetration is first attested 1605, from L. penetrationem (nom. penetratio) “a penetrating or piercing,” from penetrare. The sexual sense is attested from 1613. Penetrating in the fig. sense of “touching the feelings intensely” is attested from 1632. [Source]
Penetrate is one of my favorite words. It not only sounds sensual coming out of someone’s mouth, but it carries such a vaguely erotic undertone when someone uses it even innocuously. Someone can be discussing a subject wholly unrelated to sex and the word will cause my ears to become erect, much like a rabbit’s when he hears something unfamiliar. For example, weather experts will talk about tornadoes and the damage they can cause. They’ll often mention that 2 x 4s can be hurled through the air at a high speed sufficient to allow them to penetrate brick walls. My ears rise up at the very mention of the word and it immediately, if only momentarily, transfers me into a sexual frame of mind.
Used erotically, “penetrate me” carries a significant emotional thrust over and above the physical manifestation it immediately presents to one’s mind. It means more than just “fuck me” - it literally means to come inside, deeply, extending past the physical into my spirit, my soul.
When I tell someone to penetrate me, I am telling them I want them inside me, physically, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually. I can tell someone to fuck me and that’s what I’ll get; physically enjoyable, but it won’t extend into my soul. And though I may enjoy being fucked, I enjoy being penetrated on a much higher plane.
You can penetrate me physically, of course, with your fingers, with your tongue, with your…cock.
You can penetrate me intellectually, engaging me in reasoned, thought-provoking conversation.
You can penetrate me emotionally, by making contact with those special spots in my psyche that resonate with the illogical components of my person.
You can penetrate me spiritually, touching me in just the right way, looking deep into my eyes, engaging my inner being.
Even used far into one’s sexual experience, it still has an aura of that initial entry. When you lie back and spread your legs, and allow the head of that cock to push into your cunt, to penetrate your cunt, there’s an adrenaline rush as it enters, as it penetrates you. When that rush infects your soul, your spirit, your being, you’ll understand the true nature of penetration.
Yes, I love being penetrated.
Decriminalization vs. Legalization
August 26, 2008
There’s been a lot of discussion in a variety of different venues over the past several years with respect to legalizing prostitution to one degree or another. Just about everyone is familiar with the fact that prostitution is illegal in the U.S. with the exception of some places in Nevada. You may not be aware that the exchange of sex for money is legal in Rhode Island as well, though that is largely the result of a loophole in the state law outlawing prostitution at large (it specifically outlaws solicitation on the street and the operation of brothels, but makes no mention of the exchange of sex for money in a private setting, and therefore private prostitution is technically legal).
I’ve been involved in several raucous classroom discussions about whether or not sex in exchange for something of value ought to be legal, and some of them have involved very heated exchanges between those who favor legalization and those who believe it ought to remain illegal. In every one of those cases, believe it or not, the overwhelming majority of people in the class favored making it legal. And, interestingly, more women (in my classes) have been in favor of legalization than men.
There are two approaches to the legalization of prostitution that many people tend to conflate with one another, though the differences between the terminology of the two is mostly one of semantics. But many sex work advocacy organizations do differentiate between the two, and I am inclined to do as well to make the differences easier to discuss.
The first of these two approaches is legalization. Legalization, as it is used by most advocates involves making prostitution patently legal and developing a regulatory scheme to control and tax it. This is the way it is done in Nevada. Any county with a population of less than 400K (which is every county except for those where Las Vegas and Reno are located) is free to allow brothels to operate, and to set up rules and regulations to control how the brothels and those who work in them operate. And there are tons of rules governing everything from the licensing of the prostitutes to specific sex acts that are prohibited.
The other approach is known as decriminalization. This involves simply doing away with the statutes outlawing prostitution. This is the approach favored by most advocates because it removes the necessity of having the state act as a “pimp” and controlling or extorting money from individual sex workers (usually through requiring the purchase of expensive “licenses”). Technically speaking, the situation in Rhode Island is akin to decriminalization, albeit unintentionally. (To Rhode Island’s credit, though, the state legislature has resisted several attempts to close the loophole).
The major difference between the two is that with the latter there are no prostitution-specific regulations imposed by the state. Rather, regulation of the industry is accomplished primarily through existing statutes and regulations covering employment and public health (for example).
There are pros and cons to both approaches, and where you fall typically has something to do with the role you believe the government ought to play in prostitution. Many people believe government having any role at all infringes upon the rights of the workers to earn a living in a manner of their choosing, while there are others who see it as a legitimate role of government to ensure the integrity and safety of the work itself, those who perform it, and those who use its services.
I tend to believe that at least some modicum of regulation is necessary to ensure that the industry operates with minimal basic standards, to ensure the safety of the workers and their clients, and to allow the community to integrate sex work into the local economic infrastructure. I therefore favor some government regulatory role in prostitution. As much as those who think it should be totally unregulated would like to believe, any industry left unchecked will tend toward taking advantage of the workers and the clients by its nature, so I believe there is a need for at least a minimal involvement of the government in order to help keep things on the up and up.
So, given all of this, I was sitting around last night thinking about how I’d structure the regulation of the industry if I could design my own set of rules and regulations, and the following is what I came up with.
Alexa’s Model Prostitution Law
If I had to design my own laws regarding the legalization of prostitution, this is what I’d do. I know much of this disagrees with what many activists think ought to be done, but the purpose of my rules would be to make it safe and legal for them to work and ensure the safety and confidentiality of their clients.
Unlike many of the advocacy groups, I would not try to dispense with eons of stigmatization associated with sex work. While I believe that is a laudable goal, I don’t believe it is reasonable to expect to be able to do that in today’s society. Not at this point, at any rate. We certainly should strive for that, of course, but in the interim we need to approach this from a more practical perspective.
The first thing I’d do is remove all existing laws against prostitution from the books and start from scratch, with the exception of those involving the trafficking of humans (and make those applicable to all forms of human trafficking, not just sex workers). It would remain illegal to force or coerce anyone into working in prostitution, or to employ anyone under the age of 18 as a prostitute, or to work as a prostitute if you’re under the age of 18. Some might advocate for an age of 21, but I know many women who’ve worked as prostitutes to put themselves through college and it simply isn’t necessary to force them to wait until they’re 21 to do that. They can get any other job at 18, so prostitution should be just as much a solution for them as anything else.
Now for the specifics:
Streetwalking and solicitation would remain illegal. There are two significant reasons why I believe this should continue to be illegal. There are are a variety of safety issues involved, especially with respect to the sex workers themselves. Streetwalkers are many times more likely to be raped or killed than any other category of sex worker. Working from the street is about as unsafe as you can get in this industry, in fact. Many of the advocate groups claim this is the result of the fact that prostitution is illegal to begin with, but any time you get into random vehicles with strangers, you run the risk of being abducted, beaten, raped, and possibly killed, whether what you’re doing is legal or not.
The second reason involves quality of life issues in neighborhoods. While I think you should be free to engage in your chosen line of work wherever you wish, I don’t think it is unreasonable for neighborhoods to not want prostitutes on their streets. Removing the criminalization of streetwalking would allow prostitutes to set up shop in any neighborhood they wish.
I just can’t see any rational basis for legalizing street-based solicitation, in all actuality. If anyone can offer a coherent reason to do so, I’d sure be interested to hear it. I have seen advocacy groups openly suggest making street walking legal, but I don’t think you stand even the remotest of chance of getting something like that passed. Ever. The exchange of sex for money should take place indoors, in private, between consenting adults.
What would I do with those arrested on the street? Well, that’s a good question. I don’t know for sure, but I wouldn’t treat them like the criminal justice system does now. See my point below about creating programs to get prostitutes out of the business - maybe that would be a solution.
Jurisdictions would be prohibited from requiring “registration” or “licensing” of prostitutes. There’s no legitimate reason for this. Requiring sex workers to register puts their name in public records as being involved in sex work. For many, it is a private matter and they ought not be required to put this kind of personal information out there for future employers, pervs, lawyers, and anyone else with an agenda to be able to get a hold of. Being labeled a sex worker also carries restrictions with respect to subjects like international travel (some countries refuse to permit sex workers to enter), for example. The only legitimate reason one could argue for doing this would be to ensure medical testing is accomplished, and I’ll address that in a minute.
There is an argument that it is a good idea to do background checks. Why? Why would it be a problem for someone with say, a shoplifting charge, or even a robbery charge on their record to be a prostitute? Why would that be any more of a problem than any other personal service worker having a similar record (and for whom we don’t require background checks)? I believe the Nevada law even prohibits someone who’s been convicted of prostitution from becoming a prostitute. There’s some logic for you. I do think it would be a good idea to prohibit anyone whose been convicted of any type of organized crime or public corruption from owning or operating brothels or working as agents for sex workers, though.
Regardless, if the legislature sees some need to prohibit someone with a particular crime in their background from engaging in prostitution, make it a crime to do so. If they get caught prostituting with this in their background, then they can be charged with some violation of that law. There’s no reason for local law enforcement to extort money from sex workers in the name of “licensing” them. I’d have no problem with jurisdictions requiring prostitutes to have a standard business license if A) they require all other self-employed, personal-service individuals to have them, and B) they don’t set “special” (read: high) rates for prostitutes.
Prostitutes would be prohibited from seeing more than one, perhaps two, clients at a residence, either a house in a residential neighborhood, apartment, condo, etc. Neighborhoods have the right to ensure the value of the housing remains stable, and that a suitable climate to raise a family is maintained. Having a lot of traffic would draw attention to the fact that someone was seeing a lot of people, result in traffic and congestion problems, etc. Like it or not, having a de facto brothel in a neighborhood does bring down property values and negatively impacts the quality of life in those neighborhoods from a variety of standpoints. Therefore, if a prostitute was going to see client in his/her own home (incalls), then s/he could see no more than one or two in any 24 hour period under my plan. The option for outcalls is there, as would be renting/leasing space in brothels or other facilities in areas zoned to allow prostitution (see below).
Prostitutes would not be required to work in brothels. Nevada requires all prostitutes to work in brothels, and while I’ve spoken with some prostitutes who are okay with that, Amanda’s experience clearly shows that it is not necessarily the best environment for every sex worker. Certainly it should be an option, but many sex workers don’t want to work in this type of restrictive environment and shouldn’t have to give up that much of their freedom just to be able to earn a living.
Brothels cannot be zoned completely out of any city over a certain population. They could be restricted to commercial or industrial areas if necessary, but allowing individual large cities to simply zone them out of existence would be disallowed. I don’t necessarily have a specific population in mind, but something on the order of the largest cities within the state would require brothels that otherwise operated within the law be allowed to operate unmolested by local law enforcement and other officials. Law enforcement and public health agencies would have the right to inspect the facilities to ensure no one was working illegally and that all relevant health codes were being followed, of course. Jurisdictions would have the right to set reasonable health codes/practices for brothels if they so desire, and perhaps reasonable restrictions on the size or number of employees of brothels in any given zoning class. Local jurisdictions would have no zoning or land use regulatory authority over individual sex workers, however.
The state or local jurisdictions could not legislate or outlaw specific practices. The specific activities that take place between two consenting individuals should be left to them, and the government has no business deciding what these two people should do in the privacy of their own sexual relationship, even if it is one revolving around a financial transaction, so long as both parties are amenable to it (see the point on contracts below). This includes anal sex, BDSM activities, or any other activity that is legal between consenting adults who are in any other type of relationship.
There could be no children or minors in any place where prostitution was being practiced. This applies largely to individual houses and other residences. While it may be permissible to practice prostitution in one’s own residence, doing so with children or other minors in the place would be a crime. I know this would present a hardship for the single mother who’s trying to make ends meet and take care of her children, but kids should not be exposed to this kind of activity at all. Anyone found prostituting a child would face felony charges, as well the likely loss of custody of their children.
Written contracts would be required between the prostitute and the client. This contract would be executed at the beginning of the transaction, and would specify exactly what services the prostitute is prepared to offer, for how much, and for what time period. Further, it’d require the client to certify that s/he understands what the words “no” and “stop” mean, and the prostitute’s safe/stop words and that failure to honor those at any point during the transaction, might result in a charge of rape. Law enforcement and the judicial system would be required to treat any such claim of rape as legitimate until it was determined to be otherwise.
Prostitutes would be required to be tested periodically, perhaps once or twice a month. I know a lot of activists don’t like this at all, but I think the government has a compelling interest in preventing the transfer of STDs. The reason no transmission of STDs has been documented between prostitutes and clients in Nevada is because the law requires the prostitutes be tested every week. I would require public health departments to perform the testing and to do so anonymously, just like HIV testing has been done for years. The prostitutes would be required to show their latest test results to any client who requested to see them (as well as local public health officials), and if the prostitute knowingly saw clients without full disclosure after a positive result before the disease was remediated, s/he’d be charged with some type of assault. If the state’s laws did not already address this type of assault specifically, they’d need to be modified to do so. Note that I didn’t say that prostitutes wouldn’t be allowed to see clients if they were infected - there are plenty of things sex workers can do that don’t involve the exchange of bodily fluids or otherwise present a risk for infection. The problem comes in when the infection isn’t disclosed - then it becomes an issue.
And yes, I realize that prostitutes only account for about 2-3% of all STD transmissions. And I know that, in some cases, the latency time between infection and detectability makes tests a less than 100% reliable indicator. I don’t believe that should preclude using as many reasonable safety mechanisms as possible, however.
What about testing of the clients, you say? As soon a someone shows me a legitimate, logistically feasible way to test clients on such a massive scale, I’d be happy to entertain that requirement as well. As of now, it just isn’t feasible to require STD testing of all clients.
Well, you say, we don’t require food workers to be tested for things like Hepatitis, which infects a great many people each year. Perhaps we should. The fact of the matter is that Hepatitis and other non-STD infections are not considered “private” or stigmatized diseases and there’s a lot of publicity associated with them when an outbreak occurs. STDs are stigmatized diseases and not discussed openly as a general rule, so there isn’t the kind of public attention paid to them that we see with food-borne illnesses or other human-borne infectious diseases. Therefore, the best way I see to mitigate the potential for infection transfer is to require workers to be tested. I personally get tested once a month on my own anyway, and I don’t see that as intrusive at all. In fact, I see it as a very responsible thing to do for myself and my clients.
Some have asserted that a clean test might lead to clients pressuring workers for bareback sex, and I agree, that is certainly a potential. I think this is a point that must be negotiated between the worker and the client as a part of the contract process. If the contract stated that protection must be used and the client attempts or performs sex without one, then he’s violated the contract and would be guilty of a sexual assault (or whatever crime the state elected to define it as). And, for the record, I am not in favor of mandated condom use - I think that should be between the worker and the client, and if both can establish that they’re clean and want to have condom-free sex, then that should be their prerogative.
Prostitutes would be required to keep records of their clients. These records would be confidential and be available to law enforcement only with a subpoena during criminal investigations, and public health officials when tracking down STD infections. Tax officials might also have access to these to ensure workers were paying their fair share of taxes.
Services/Agencies would be prohibited from charging the prostitute more than 25% of the client’s fee for their services. While I personally think pimping ought to be wholly illegal, I recognize that many prostitutes will not/could not work independently and would prefer to have a service arrange the scheduling and so forth. With the work no longer being illegal, there wouldn’t be quite the number of risk factors the agency would need to mitigate (i.e., vetting for law enforcement, etc.). The agency would largely be functioning only as a booking agent for the prostitute, so the days of the 40-50% fee share would be gone. Agencies of a certain size would be required to provide some form of health insurance and other benefits to its workers, contract or otherwise. Agencies would be required to disclose any unique problems or issues a particular client exhibited that might impact the sex worker so that situations like THIS could be avoided. Failure to do so would subject the agency to liability for damages.
Offer economic incentives for groups of individuals to form co-operative brothels. This is an idea I got from reading Amanda’s writing, and something that a group of sex workers are trying to implement in time for the Olympics in Vancouver, Canada. The sex workers themselves would own and operate the brothel, they’d share in the costs required to operate it, and the profits would be split among them, not a pimp or an absentee owner. I’d try to find a way to provide some form of tax break or other economic incentive to encourage this kind of cooperative effort.
Public services and appurtenances, including social services agencies, public health and welfare agencies, workers compensation laws, discrimination laws, legal services, safe workplace rules, etc., would apply to sex work just as they do any other service job. All public sector agencies would be required to treat sex workers with the same respect and dignity afforded to any other class of worker, and extend all rights, benefits and privileges associated with their functions to sex workers just as they would any other class of worker, including the right to sue, the right to petition for redress, to file discrimination suits, etc. Health and medical professionals would be prohibited from refusing to treat sex workers because of their work, all other things being equal. Insurance companies would be prevented from charging sex workers significantly higher rates unless they can definitively show a higher degree of risk based on job description.
Create community-based programs to help sex workers leave the field when they’re ready. I’d probably fund this through some sort of tax on the client, but the funds would go to community-based organizations that work to help sex workers leave the industry, regardless of how they got in, why they wish to get out, or which strata they occupy.
So that pretty much wraps up what I’d consider doing if it were up to me. I do believe that this represents a fairly middle-of-the-road approach to it, and I’d be interested in any thoughts, ideas, comments, or suggestions you guys might have.
