The Modern Courtesan

A few weeks ago, I discussed the rationale behind why I use the word courtesan to describe what I do.  In that post, I made the point that…

…my intent is to offer myself as someone who will enrapture my clients, entertain them, beguile them with my charms, and then, if they’re so-inclined, provide them with a sexual experience they’re not likely to forget any time soon. Hopefully, this will lead them to want to spend more time with me in the future, thereby ensuring my ability to earn a living. In other words, I see myself as akin to a true courtesan, adapted to a modern day form.

It is true that the word courtesan^W has an old-school, historical feel to it that many people believe precludes its being used legitimately in today’s society.   I mean, no one really plays the performer, artist, and poetess that characterized many courtesans of olden times these days, right?

So is there really such a thing as a courtesan in modern times?

I think there is, even if there is no universally-agreed upon descriptor for it.  Aina Montero, an Ecuadorian escort, seems to agree and has coined a new term that seems to have potential for these times:  The Modern Courtesan.  And she’s developed a pretty decent description of it.  From her blog:

The modern courtesan experience (MCE) is an assignation or rendezvous with a private companion who has the following personal characteristics. She (or he) must have a graduate education and speak a minimum of two languages fluently. The modern courtesan (or courtier) should be well-spoken, an excellent conversationalist, well-traveled, familiar with more than one culture, knowledgeable about current affairs, stylish in her (or his) dress, and comfortable in a variety of social situations.

The term modern courtesan experience (MCE) shall never be used to refer to the exchange of specific sexual acts for compensation. By definition, a lady (or gentleman) who offers a menu of sexual services is not offering a modern courtesan experience.

The modern courtesan experience is also not defined by the age, gender, race, ethnicity or body type of the companion, with the exception that a modern courtesan (or courtier) must be a minimum of 23 years of age, in order to allow her (or him) time to achieve the educational requirements and to gain the requisite life experience, conversational skills and personal confidence.

This is pretty good start, and I’m in love with the concept of the “modern courtesan experience.” And since I am now 23, I can’t argue with the age limit she has suggested.

But, while I’d agree that this is a pretty reasonable characterization of what one might consider a modern courtesan, I think she left one critical characteristic out of it.  To wit:  The Modern Courtesan is sexually articulate and has the requisite experience to know how (and when) to apply the broader concepts of human sexuality to fit the desires and fantasies of her client.

Even though the courtesan is expected to be a Jill of many qualities, and her clients may genuinely enjoy those aspects of her personality, her core purpose is to provide sexual companionship to her client¹. Being sexually articulate means more than just knowing the typical definitions and acronyms that are used in the world of prostitution, knowing a multitude of positions, or knowing how to deep throat.

All of that knowledge and having a variety of skill sets is great, obviously, but the key is knowing how and when to use the tools in your sexual repertoire to provide a sexually exciting, satisfying experience for your client.  And without a breadth of knowledge and experience about the variety of sexual services that the typical gentleman (or lady) might wish to indulge in, I don’t think you’re positioned well to offer the full spectrum of services that one might reasonably expect from someone calling herself a courtesan (modern, or otherwise).

Being sexually articulate also means having an extensive sexual repertoire. Just as a master of the piano has a great many pieces in her repertoire, so the sexual artist should have many pieces in her (or his) repertoire as well.  This allows you to enthrall your client with something special, something beyond ordinary. You don’t run the risk of not having something that your client would love to enjoy (assuming your client wants more than a blowjob and a straight, missionary fuck, of course).  In my opinion, you can’t call yourself a true courtesan if you’re a one or two trick pony (no pun intended, of course).

You put all of that together with the ability to discuss a variety of topics in depth, the ability to be socially adaptable, the ability to engage with your client on multiple levels – that all goes to the root of what the modern courtesan must do to justify the use of the nomenclature (and the attendant rate structure that typically accompanies it).  Some say sexuality doesn’t need to be a part of the description.  In my opinion, though, if you don’t include the sexual aspects in your construct, well, you’re missing the core component of what it means to be a courtesan, and I don’t think you can use the word legitimately to describe yourself.

The modern courtesan needs to have as many techniques and capabilities in her sexual toolbox as possible.  No two people are alike when it comes to what gets them off, so in order to be as appealing to as diverse an audience as possible, she should be sexually flexible and have a broad range of coital and non-coital techniques, physical and psychological, at her disposal.  She needs to be able to speak sexually to her clients.  Or, in other words, she should be sexually articulate. Then, and only then, can she consider herself a true modern courtesan in my opinion.

1. And though I know some would argue that’s not the case, if anyone knows of a courtesan who doesn’t provide sexual services, please point me to her [↩]

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Tagged as: courtesan, Sexuality